Wednesday, September 05, 2007

oh, boy ...

So. You had a little baby boy, huh? Good for you!

Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails. Ninja Turtles, footballs, prom tuxedos.

A greater risk that your future grandchildren will be plucked from the clutch of your loving arms and taken away from you - possibly for much of their young lives - than if you had had a baby girl.

Face it, not all marriages survive. I hope your son is among the exceptions, but some mothers' sons will face divorce - it's an unavoidable possibility. And as most children of divorce go with the mother, there's a probability that that mother may not feel comfortable bringing the grandkids over to see her ex-in-laws for visits like she once did. Certainly not as much as HER parents will see them.

Have a boy - possibly lose the grandkids. Have a girl - probably keep the grandkids.

Moms, teach your boys to treat girls nice. You have a vested interest in keeping his family together.



Once the grandkids reach 18, who do you think they're going to visit? Their biological dad's folks? Or the ones they might consider their "real" grandparents - their moms' and step-dads' parents.

"Yeah, they sent me cards and photos and stuff, but C'mon! I haven't seen them since I was like, what, FOUR?"

Grandparents, hug your sons' kids tightly next time you see them. There's a coin-flip of a demon out there who wants to take them away.

Maybe far away.

And while you're at it, hug your daughter's kids closely, too. Specially if you're squeezing for four.



Anonymous Freddie said...

Oh, man. This post really hit a nerve. Very true.

Thursday, September 06, 2007 2:16:00 PM  
Blogger Lamar The Revenger said...

you tellin me freddie. i got to show that one to the wifey.

Friday, September 07, 2007 3:07:00 AM  
Blogger James Burnett said...

This is deep. Here's to hoping when Mrs. B and me go to her next ultrasound that we find out it's a girl.

Friday, September 07, 2007 10:41:00 AM  
Blogger M@ said...

Grandparents don't HAVE rights. They have no legal rights, nor should they.

Children belong to their parents. Period. It's up to people to make sure they maintain good relationships w/ their children BEFORE things get out of hand.

Of course, my model is forgive and forget.

Friday, September 07, 2007 10:54:00 AM  
Blogger The Sarcasticynic said...

Correct. A grandparent claiming they have the RIGHT to see their grandchildren may be in for a rude awakening.

But this isn't about rights or entitlements. It's merely a cynical look at a sad fact of life.

If anything can be taken away from this, it's that parents can work to teach their kids to play well with others. There's more at stake than one might initially consider.

Friday, September 07, 2007 3:51:00 PM  
Blogger James Burnett said...

I don't know, Sarc. There's legal precedent on the side of grandparents. There have been a number of cases in the past 20 years - at least one of which was appealed all the way to the US Supreme - in which grandparents sued for "the right" to see their grandchildren and have a relationship with their grandchildren. And in the cases in which the hurdle was simply that the grandparents and parents didn't get along, the highest courts in the land have sided with the grandparents and granted them visitation rights. In the cases, where the parents had some reasonable fear that the grandparents might harm the kids the courts naturally ruled against the grandparents.

Monday, September 10, 2007 12:34:00 PM  
Blogger The Sarcasticynic said...

Granted, James. Grandparents can knock on the great wooden doors of the Supreme Court and ask to be granted the privilege of seeing the grandkids. But for the other 99%, they're just going to sit with cats on their laps and tears flowing down their cheeks.

Sucks, doesn't it?

Monday, September 10, 2007 3:48:00 PM  

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