I'm a retard
The other day I had a conversation with a gentleman I'd never met before. After talking for a while, I asked him what he does for a living. His answer kinda threw me.
I said, "Scuse me??"
Again he repeated, "Ah'm retard."
I asked for a little clarification.
He said, "Ah worked for the Post Office for 30 years, and Ah retard two years ago.'
So he retired.
God I love the South.